Spiritual Life of a Family
Hosts of people face marriage, parenthood, and the governing of their homes completely mystified as to how God's
kingdom can come abide where they are. It's said that we face these situations like our parents did because they
are our role models. That can be a frightening prospect for many whose parents were physically or emotionally abusive,
substance dependent, relationally dysfunctional, or simply unbelieving. But the Scriptures reveal that we are no
longer bound to our past!
New Life, New Family
Since we have been born again into a new family, who is now our Father? (Gal. 4:6)
Turn to Romans 4:16. Who is also called our Father?
Abraham, like many of us, faced a situation in which he had to learn to live a new life-style apart from an
unbelieving family. Read Genesis 12:1–3 and write down what was God's command to him, along with what God promised
to do through him.
Not only did Abraham go to live in a new country and adopt a new lifestyle, what else drastically changed in
Abraham's life:
Gen. 17:5
Gen. 17:10–11
Kingdom Extra
Abraham is shown in both Old Testament and New Testament as the prototype of all who experience God's processes
of seeking to reinstate man through redemption, first and foremost, in his relationship to God by faith, without
words (Rom. 4:1–25). But too seldom is the second facet of redemption noted. Abraham is also shown as a case of
God's program to recover man's “reign in life” (Rom. 5:17). Abraham is designated as the “father” of all who walk
his pathway of faith (Rom. 4:12). As such, he is God's revealed example of His plan to eventually reestablish His
kingdom's rule in all the Earth through people of His covenant. Through Abraham, whom He wills to become “a great
nation” (restoring rule) and to whom He chooses to give a “great name” (restoring authority), God declares His
plans to beget innumerable children who will be modeled after this prototypical “father of faith.” This truth is
confirmed in Romans 4:13, where Abraham's designation as “heir of the world” parallels Jesus' promise that His
followers, who humble themselves in faith, shall also be recipients of “the kingdom” and shall “inherit the earth”
(Matt 5:3–5). [Spirit-Filled Life Bible (Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson Publishers, 1991), 22, “Kingdom Dynamics:
Gen. 12:1–3, ‘Prototype’ Kingdom Person.”]
Through Abraham's life, we can also see very practical ways that he led his family spiritually. Look up the
following verses and write down the aspects of spiritual life that we see lived out by Abraham. (The first one
is done for you.)
Rom. 4:3 believing God (and His Word)
Gen. 14:14–17
Gen. 14:18
Gen. 15:13–21; 18:16–21 (Compare these verses with 1 Cor. 12:7–11.)
Gen. 18:22–33
Gen. 20:17
Go back over the above list. Which of these aspects of spiritual life do you feel are currently active in your
family life? As we continue through this study, note the areas where your family needs to grow spiritually and
begin formulating a plan of action.
Worship in the Family
We see worship many times throughout Abraham's life as he obeyed the Lord, believed His Word, and built altars
to make covenants and offer sacrifices. In many respects his life was lived out in the spirit of worship. But that
is seen no more clearly than when, at the command of the Lord, he went to worship prepared to offer Isaac as the
sacrifice. It is obvious in reading this account that Isaac was familiar with the procedures of the worship process.
Kingdom Extra
Psalm 145:4 emphasizes the importance of passing on the praise of God from one generation to another. Praise
is to be taught to our children. The Bible enjoins us to raise a generation of praisers. We must not merely “suppose”
that children will grow up and desire God. We must be careful. Whatever we possess of God's blessing and revelation
can be lost in one generation. We must consistently praise Him and we must also teach (by example, as well as by
words), so our children and our children's children will do the same. [Ibid., 876, “Kingdom Dynamics: Ps. 145:4,
Teach Your Children Praise.”]
Read Gen. 22:1–14 and note the lessons that Isaac would have learned from his father. What was Abraham's immediate
response to the Lord when he received this startling command? (vv. 1–3)
How do we see Isaac's parallel obedience in verse 9?
What does verse 5 tell us about the practice of worship in Abraham's home?
How does verse 7 show that Isaac was familiar with Abraham's worship practices?
Kingdom Extra
Isaac was born to Abraham and Sarah as a result of covenant promise (Gen. 17:1). God's requirement of Abraham
to sacrifice Isaac was the supreme test that would demonstrate both Abraham's reverence for God and his confidence
in God's faithfulness to keep His covenant promise. He prepared to offer up Isaac with the assurance the God would
raise him from death itself (Heb. 11:19). God made a timely intervention and provided a ram to be sacrificed instead
of Isaac. This is a dramatic foreshadowing of God's offering His only begotten Son to die in our place (John 3:16).
God's covenant love gave Abraham a son, and covenant love provided a substitutionary sacrifice to save that son.
Centuries later covenant love would cause God to give His own Son as a blood sacrifice for the sons of men. [Ibid.,
36, “Kingdom Dynamics: Gen. 22:13, Isaac, the Result of Covenant.”]
Later in Genesis, we read that God's covenant with Abraham was restated to Isaac (26:2–5). What understanding
of God's covenant promise do you think Isaac showed in chapter 22?
What kind of sacrifice does Hebrews 13:15 tell us that we are to offer now?
Kingdom Extra
Why is praising God a sacrifice? The word “sacrifice” (Greek thusia) comes from the root thuo, a
verb meaning “to kill or slaughter for a purpose.” Praise often requires that we “kill” our pride, fear, or sloth—anything
that threatens to diminish or interfere with our worship of the Lord. We also discover here the basis of all our
praise: the sacrifice of our Lord Jesus Christ. It is by Him, in Him, with Him, to Him, and for Him that we offer
our sacrifice of praise to God. Praise will never be successfully hindered when we keep its focus on Him—the Founder
and Completer of our salvation. His Cross, His Blood—His love gift and forgiveness to us—keep praise as a living
sacrifice. [Ibid., 1890, “Kingdom Dynamics: Heb. 13:10–15, The Sacrifice of Praise.”]
Faith Alive
Does your family praise the Lord together? How do you do that?
What are some ways you can incorporate praise naturally into your family life?
Why do you think that praising the Lord in your home is important spiritually? emotionally? mentally?
The Family That Prays Together
In Genesis 18:22–33 we see Abraham interceding for Sodom—and thus for his nephew, Lot and his family. Likewise
we are called to prayer. Our pattern for prayer is given in Luke 11:2–4. Read the Lord's Prayer in Luke 11:2–4.
List the different topics covered in the prayer:
Kingdom Extra
Jesus' words “Your kingdom come” are more than a suggestion to pray for a distant millennial day, for everything
in this prayer is current. This prayer is not a formula for repetition so much as it is an outline for expansion.
Worship is to be longer than a sentence. Petitions are not confined to bread. Forgiveness is to be requested in
specifics, not generalities, and prayer for the entry of God's kingdom into present earthborn situations is not
accomplished in a momentary utterance. The verb mood and tense of “Your Kingdom come” essentially says, “Father,
let Your kingdom come here and now!”
Such prayerful intervention is called intercession. Motivation toward such prayer occurs when
we recognize the importance Jesus placed on prayer in helping us serve in our roles as “kingdom administrators.”
Without the intervention of God's kingdom rule through prayer, Earth's circumstances will succumb to inevitable
consequences. Earthly scenes of need must be penetrated by God's “will here as in heaven.” Either the weakness
of man's rule (the flesh) or the viciousness of hell's works (the devil) will prevail. God's power alone can change
things and bring heaven's rule (kingdom) instead, and the honor and the glory for prayer's answers are His. However,
the praying is ours to do: unless we ask for the intervention of His kingdom and obey His prayer-lessons, nothing
will change. All kingdom ministry begins with, is sustained by, and will triumph through prayer. [Ibid., 1535,
“Kingdom Dynamics: Luke 11:2–4, Prayer and Intercession.”]
Look up the following verses and write down what they promise prayer will accomplish:
Matt. 17:21
Acts 10:4
Phil. 4:6
James 5:15, 16
When are we supposed to pray?
Luke 18:1
1 Thess. 5:17
For what are we supposed to pray?
Ps. 122:6
Matt. 5:44; 9:38; 26:41
Luke 22:40
Heb. 13:18
Who helps us to pray?
Romans 8:26
Our family prays together a lot: mealtimes, bedtime, on the way to school, when we get an urgent phone call,
when someone is sick, baseball games, church, throughout the day for one another. When does your family pray?
Are these times of freedom and openness, or are they embarrassing and awkward for one or more family members?
What are some ways you can make prayer times more natural in your home? Or is there resistance to participation?
As we move our families into a more active prayer life we must recognize that as spiritual leaders within our
own families, a change in prayer habits will have to begin with us.
Sharing the Lord's Table
First Corinthians 11:24–25 tells us that we are to share the Lord's Table “in remembrance of Me” (Jesus). There
are multiplied times in the course of a family's life that we need to remember what Jesus has accomplished for
us through His death and what He calls us to live in through His life. We need to remember that healing is provided
for us through the Cross when someone is sick. We need to remember that He is our Provider for all things when
finances are low. We need to remember that He is our Forgiver when we've sinned against one another. And the list
could go on forever.
In Genesis 14:18, we see Abraham partaking of the bread and cup as Melchizedek, the priest of the Most High
God, comes out to bless him following a battle.
Read 1 Corinthians 11:23–30 and answer the following questions. What are we supposed to be remembering when
we partake?
Do you think we are just supposed to be reviewing the events that took place at the Cross, or are we to be praising
God for what was accomplished there, or both? Explain your answer.
Verses 27–29 give a severe and somber warning to us. What do you think this warning means?
What kind of attitude toward Communion do you think is required as we come to the table?
Read verse 30. What does this have to do with receiving Communion?
Is it possible that some people are sick because they simply haven't received the healing that is available
to them through the Cross?
Kingdom Extra
Just as the act of water baptism outwardly declares or confesses an inward experience of salvation through the
blood of the Lord Jesus, each observance of the Lord's Table is a powerful occasion for faith's confession. In
the ordinance, the Christian confesses before all heaven that he not only has believed, but that he has not forgotten.
“In remembrance” involves more than just memory; the word suggests an “active calling to mind” (Wycliffe).
The word “for” introduces the reason the Supper is continually repeated. It is an acted sermon, for it “proclaims”
the Lord's death. The outward act of faith, as the bread and cup taken, is explicitly said to be an ongoing, active
confession—literally “you are proclaiming” (v. 26). Each occasion of partaking is an opportunity to say,
proclaim, or confess again: “I herewith lay hold of all the benefits of Jesus Christ's full redemption for
my life—forgiveness, wholeness, strength, health, sufficiency.” The Lord's Supper is not to be simply a ritual
remembrance, but an active confession, by which you actively will to call to memory and appropriate today all
that Jesus has provided and promised through His Cross. [Ibid., 1735, “Kingdom Dynamics: 1 Cor. 11:23–26, Faith
at the Lord's Table.”]
The Word In Our Families
Abraham didn't have the benefit we have of having God's written Word to study. But he lived by God's spoken
Word to him and patterned his life after God's Word in every area. Copy Romans 4:20, 21 to see how Abraham lived
his life.
Word Wealth
Abraham had learned to “live his life by the logos of God.” Most of us are familiar with the Greek word,
logos, which describes the Word of God in its various demonstrations. Strong's (#3056) defines
logos as a transmission of thought, communication, a word of explanation, an utterance, discourse, divine
revelation, talk, statement, instruction, an oracle, divine promise, divine doctrine, divine declaration. Jesus
is the living logos (John 1:1); the Bible is the written logos (Heb. 4:12); and the Holy Spirit utters
the spoken logos (1 Cor. 2:13). [Ibid., 1665, “Word Wealth Acts 19:20 word.”]
Faith Alive
Look up the following verses that tell of times the Lord spoke to Abraham. What did God say and what did Abraham
do?
Gen. 12:1–8
Gen. 13:14–18
Gen. 15:1–6
Gen. 17:1–10, 23–27
Gen. 18:10–15, 21:1–4
Gen. 22:1–14
Does the Lord speak to you this clearly today? If not, do you think He wants to?
How do you think hearing God's voice (either through vision, impression, or Scripture) would affect your family
life? How did it affect Abraham's?
List several ways the Lord has spoken to you in regard to your family. What were the results?
Kingdom Extra
We are all inexperienced in too much of life to be without a guide. God's Word is that guide. The entirety of
Psalm 119 unfolds manifold features of God's Word, showing how dynamically it will assist us in life's most practical
circumstances. But no single verse focuses this more clearly than verse 105, which shows how God's Word lights
the way, giving direction for each step (“to my feet”) and giving wisdom for long-range plans (“to
my path”). Joshua links the regular application of God's Word to life as the most certain way to both success and
prosperity in living (Josh. 1:8). Further, Psalm 119:130 notes the wisdom God's Word gives to the “simple” (Hebrew
pethawee), a truth specifically pointing toward the avoidance of making decisions based on human delusion
or outright senselessness. Also, Proverbs 6:23 reminds us that the “reproofs” or corrections the Bible gives are
as much a part of the “light” it provides as any positive or confirming direction we find therein. Let God's Word
guide, correct, instruct, lead, teach, and confirm. Do not hasten ahead without it—ever. [Ibid., 860, “Kingdom
Dynamics: Ps. 119:105, God's Word and Practical, Fruitful Living.”]
A miscalculation parents often make is to assume that their children will simply “absorb the Word” in the environment
of a believing home. Or they believe that what their children receive at Sunday School each week will be enough
to teach them the basic beliefs and doctrines of Scriptures. But, as with most other areas of our children's lives,
it requires much more of us. The Word in our families must be lived out in front of them. It requires teaching,
explaining, demonstrating, applying, illustrating, proving, memorizing—literally embodying all that scripture can
mean in our lives. As we do this, we will be begin to see incorporated into our homes and our children's lives
the great peace that the Bible promises for those who love God's law (see Ps. 119:165).
Faith Alive
What are you currently doing to help your children learn and incorporate the Word into their lives?
What are some things you could begin doing to accomplish this task?
List three ways that you have seen the peace of the Holy Spirit permeate your home as a result of the Word.
Spiritual Warfare for the Family
In Genesis 14:14–17, we see Abraham going to battle for the rescue of Lot and his family. In Abraham's case,
he went to an actual battle against actual territorial rulers. Who or what are we to do battle against?
Eph. 6:12
1 Pet. 5:8
Praise God, He doesn't leave us defenseless against our adversary. In Ephesians 6:10–18, the apostle Paul lists
the armor and weapons that we are to put on. What are they?
Word Wealth
Paul admonishes us to put on the whole armor of God in order to stand against the forces of hell. It is clear
that our warfare is not against physical forces, but against invisible powers who have clearly defined levels of
authority in a real, though invisible, sphere of activity. Paul, however, not only warns us of a clearly defined
structure in the invisible realm, he instructs us to take up the whole armor of God in order to maintain a “battle-stance”
against this unseen satanic structure. All of this armor is not just a passive protection in facing the enemy;
it is to be used offensively against these satanic forces. Note Paul's final directive: we are to be “praying always
with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit” (v. 18). Thus, prayer is not so much a weapon, or even a part of
the armor, as it is the means by which we engage in the battle itself and the purpose for which we are armed. To
put on the armor of God is to prepare for battle. Prayer is the battle itself, with God's Word being our chief
weapon employed against Satan during our struggle. [Ibid., 1797, “Kingdom Dynamics: Eph. 6:10–18, Spiritual Warfare.”]
Faith Alive
In our culture, the battle for the family can engage at almost any dimension from substance abuse and violence
to attitudes and disobedience to negative media influences and overwork. In your family life, right now, where
do you feel the greatest battle is being waged?
Has the Lord given you specific directives in prayer to see this battle through to its conclusion?
Write down a promise from God's Word that promises victory in that area.
Kingdom Extra
In Matthew 11:12, Jesus asserts the “violence” of the kingdom. The unique grammatical construction of the text
does not make clear if the kingdom of God is the victim of violence or if, as the kingdom advances in victory,
it does so through violent spiritual conflict and warfare. But the context does. Jesus' references to the nonreligious
style of John and the confrontive, miraculous ministry of Elijah teach that the kingdom of God makes its penetration
by a kind of violent entry opposing the human status quo. It transcends the “softness” (v. 8) of staid religious
formalism and exceeds the pretension of child's play (vv. 16, 17). It refuses to “dance to the music” of society's
expectation that the religious community provide either entertainment (“we played the flute”) or dead traditionalism
(“we mourned”).
Jesus defines the “violence” of His kingdom's expansion by defining the “sword” and “fire” He has brought as
different from the battle techniques of political or military warfare (compare Matt. 10:34–39 and Luke 12:49–53
with John 18:36). The upheaval caused by the kingdom of God is not caused by political provocation or armed advance.
It is the result of God's order shaking relationships, households, cities, and nations by the entry of the Holy
Spirit's power working in people. (See also Luke 16:16). [Ibid., 1424, “Kingdom Dynamics: Matt. 11:12, Taking It
by Force.”]
We are never to hesitate to minister or move into warfare. We have been empowered by Jesus Himself! But remember
that ministry begins at home.
Spiritual Gifts in the Family
Too often, our concept of the operation of spiritual gifts is confined to miraculous healing or the giving of
a tongue and interpretation. And while spiritual gifts obviously cover those areas, it can extend to much more—especially
in our families!
In Genesis 18:16–33, we see Abraham receive a spiritual gift in the form of a word of knowledge: the Lord simply
told Abraham what He was about to do so Abraham could intercede. In raising our children, we have often received
such gifts in regard to our kids' attitudes, life choices, turning points, friends, and spiritual lives. We've
even had the Lord show us things about such practical areas as their health, grades, and sleep needs. God is intensely
interested about every area of our lives and is ready and willing to give us guidance in those areas if we will
turn to Him.
Faith Alive
Turn to 1 Corinthians 12:7–10 and list the nine gifts of the Holy Spirit.
Are there ways that you have seen any of these gifts operate within the life of your family? What are they?
Do you feel fearful or hesitant in any way about the gifts of the Holy Spirit functioning within your family? Why?
How does the instruction and encouragement in 1 Corinthians 12 answer to any fears you may have?
What are some ways you could invite the function of these gifts into your family? (i.e., When someone is sick,
you could make prayer for healing your “first resort” rather than the doctor).
A Word About Healing
Christians, in their zeal, can sometimes overlook the practical wisdom of going to the doctor. They disregard
the fact that the Lord may be giving them a gift of wisdom in going to the doctor, where He wants to work a gift
of healing to them through the doctor! All good gifts come from the Father (James 1:17), and it's fairly safe to
say that something (medicine) and someone (doctor) who helps make people well is a good gift. So pray first, but
if the Lord tells you to go to the doctor, don't feel like your faith has failed. Go believing that this is how
God wants to work healing to your family this time!
Faith Alive
We've only scratched the surface of the lessons we could learn from the life of our father, Abraham. For example,
Abraham also treated his extended family unselfishly (13:7–11), refused to compromise (14:22–24; 24:6); kept his
children in right priority before the Lord (22:1–14); had his finances in order (14:20), and had an ordered relationship
with his wife (1 Pet. 3:6). Even through Abraham's failing we learn lessons of a man ready to right wrongs (20:7–18),
and of the Lord's faithfulness to single mothers (21:16–20). Plan to take some time over the next days to examine
Abraham's life more closely and write down other lessons we could learn from him. Genesis 11:26–25:10 covers the
life of Abraham, but he is mentioned throughout the Bible. Here are some other scripture references to help you
start:
Rom. 4:1–16
Gal. 3:6–18
Heb. 11:8–19
James 2:21–23
From The Spirit-Filled Family: Holy Wisdom to Build Happy Homes by Jack W. Hayford with Rebecca Hayford Bauer. Copyright 1994 by Jack W. Hayford.
